When your little lady just won't treat you right
And your friends are asking why you fuss and fight
Sometimes you're on the edge of letting go
Sometimes she up and calls you so and so
When you just can't take no more
Say you're headed for the store
And be the longest gonest man she never did not found no more

When your lady takes to steppin' out at night
And your friends are asking where she's been all night
Be as calm as you can be so she won't know
Do what you must do and don't be slow
When your life is just a bore say your headed for the store
And be the Longest Gonest Man with the slammin' of the door

Guaranteed if you do not take my adviceYes sir!
Your life will start to cramp you like a viceLike a vice!
You ought to know she'll never change her waysNo way!
She'll mess around on you for all your days
When you just can't take no more
Say you're headed for the store
Be the longest gonest man she never did not found no more

Guaranteed if you do not take our adviceYes sir!
Your life will start to cramp you like a viceLike a vice!
You ought to know she'll never change her waysNo way!
She'll mess around on you for all your days
When your life is just a bore
Say you're headed for the store
Be the longest gonest man with the slammin' of the door

Copyright: CONCORD MUSIC PUBLISHING LLC
Writer(s): James Heath